[I need to write something...]
...or I think I'm going to explode. I've said it many times before, but I have to say it again.
I've seen the best and the worst of people that our world has to offer. I used to think that all people have some good in them, and I was perfectly happy in thinking that. But, in learning about people, and what they do to each other, I really can't go on thinking that anymore. I know too many good people who have been hurt, I know too many good people whose hopes have been shattered.
Maybe I'm taking on too much when I try to help, but sometimes I just feel so useless. There are a few people in my life that never seem to be able to be happy. I'm not saying that it's their fault or anything, on the contrary, I'm saying that one thing after another after another wears them down until they don't have any hope left for the world.
They stumble through their lives as shells of what they were before, not wanting to be like this, but not being able to revert back to themselves. I wish so much that I could help them, but I just can't seem to find a good way to do it.
This is one of the main reasons that I believe there is no "God" or any ruling power whatsoever controlling us. If there was such a benevolent power controlling our lives, why would it ever put good people through hell? What kind of sadistic asshole would ever cause so much pain to so many people? Why would anyone want to worship it, why would anyone want to reward something like this with their time, sacrifice, and lives?
Don't give me that bullshit about "Him rewarding you in the life after this one," because this is all that there is. Here and now, this is life, this is death, this is existence. You're born, you die, you rot. The end. No more happens after that.
I don't see a point in giving up yourself to something that will, in the end be pointless. Spend your time doing something that will benefit mankind as a whole, not just you. "Worshipping God makes all people look better to Him." No. If there were a God, your praying would only get you alone brownie points. So do the world a favor, get out there and help someone.
That's what I try to do, whenever I can, for whomever I can. I don't see a point on being here if I were to be so vain as to think that all problems in the world were the cause of "God's Will," or a "Grander Scheme." That's shifting blame to something else to make humankind look better. And what does it accomplish? Nothing at all, it just makes you lazy. In the end, you won't take responsibility for humanly faults, and you won't further humanity as a whole.
That's about all I have rant about tonight. Meandering, no?